tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6834596026525717264.post7845893976462708933..comments2023-12-14T13:49:25.768-08:00Comments on This Gay Relationship: Physical AffectionRick Modienhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02157314737543591048noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6834596026525717264.post-51352380789864832622014-03-21T08:27:41.650-07:002014-03-21T08:27:41.650-07:00Marcela, it's so good to hear from you again. ...Marcela, it's so good to hear from you again. <br /><br />With respect to physical affection from your partner, it sounds like you still have some good days and some not so good days. I know our stories aren't exactly alike, but there are enough similarities for me to encourage you to be patient. As I recall, that's one of the suggestions I made previously. You know from the post above that patience made all the difference between Chris and me. In fact, it accounts for why we're still together today.<br /><br />And, Marcela, please be more confident. Please don't think, as I did, that if your partner isn't ready with a hug for you all the time, it means she doesn't love you, or she doesn't want to be with you. I did that to myself with Chris, and it drove me crazy for many years. In my case, the issue was more about how insecure I felt inside, and not anything Chris felt, or didn't feel, toward me. The fact you and your partner are still together says a lot. Go with it and see what happens.<br /><br />I'm sorry to hear things between you and your family are not good. If you ever want to share some of that with me, I'd be happy to read what you have to say. And I'd also be happy to help you through it, if I'm able. <br /><br />Finally, I just want to say how much I appreciate all your kind words. You are a very sweet young lady, and you really boosted my day when I read your post. <br /><br />Every time I receive a comment or email from a reader, who's going through a difficult time or who asks for specific advice, if I'm able to help in any way, I put the time and effort into it. That's important to me. What good is my experience if I don't share it? Like Dr. Maya Angelou says, "When you learn, teach." I've learned a lot about what it means to be gay, and I welcome the opportunity to share that with readers like you, in the hope it will make a difference.<br /><br />My sincere thanks once again for keeping in touch and for your wonderful comment. I hope to hear from you again. (And good luck with everything you're going through. It's all happening exactly as it should. One day, you'll look back on it, and you'll know I was right.) <br /><br />Take good care of yourself. Rick Modienhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02157314737543591048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6834596026525717264.post-43029727489716291612014-03-20T00:41:47.560-07:002014-03-20T00:41:47.560-07:00Thank you for being always there Mr. Rick. Days ha...Thank you for being always there Mr. Rick. Days have been easier and tougher, at the same time; relationship wise it´s getting better, but family wise, worse. On the same note, I guess my crave will eventually be controlled, but at the moment, it still gets me once in a while. Like the reader, it really hits my when I´ve a romantic gesture and I get rejected, for some reason. <br /><br />I have been having the dilemma of just letting go of what I want and settle in my head that what matters is that my partner is there for me. Unfortunately, I tend to ask myself why, if there´s nothing wrong with me, as I´m told usually, why my partner thinks twice whether or not being affectionate in some form or fashion.<br /><br />I wanted to give a proper thank you note. I stumbled with this and I wanted people to know how nice you´re to all of us. I thank greatly what you do to each and everyone of us, the time and effort you put into, and the amazing heart you have.<br /><br />I guess, in the end, everyone of us will have to find their way; the only thing I´m sure is that I´m still looking for mine.<br /><br />Thanks Mr. Rick for being support and inspiration. Big shout-out to your partner Chris; same to every important person in your life.<br /><br />- The lady from MéxicoAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6834596026525717264.post-31834391937498351182014-01-31T07:56:42.898-08:002014-01-31T07:56:42.898-08:00I like your perspective on this. You're the on...I like your perspective on this. You're the one who felt uncomfortable showing physical affection. You've provided some personal insight into why that was the case, and I know you'll help others see themselves in you.<br /><br />Your line "I loved him very much at the moment, but I never knew how to express it" is my favorite. I think we learn from the example of those around us, and, if we don't see physical affection–that is, if it's not natural for us to see it and participate in it–we don't know how to do it. And, even more important, we're too scared to take the risk.<br /><br />Your story is ultimately victorious. You took a chance, and it paid off. Often, that's all it takes. The courage to do something we ordinarily wouldn't, to be someone we usually aren't. When it comes to love, it's a chance we must take; otherwise, we'll never know how good it truly feels.<br /><br />And look at what you learned from doing it. Now, you're open to physical affection. And, not only to physical affection, but also to one of the most important and beautiful and comforting and validating aspects of love.<br /><br />Thanks for giving me and my readers your perspective. Together, hopefully we'll encourage others to take that risk, as well.<br /><br />All the very best. Rick Modienhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02157314737543591048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6834596026525717264.post-24145706208596507882014-01-30T06:01:05.105-08:002014-01-30T06:01:05.105-08:00I could relate to this story as well.
I wasn’t rai...I could relate to this story as well.<br />I wasn’t raised in a touchy-feely family either. That made me liked the idea of living alone all by myself. Then i fell in love with him. When we walked, like on a park, he loved to hold my hand. But it felt strange for me. So i, in reflex, pulled my hand away. <br /><br />He would be sad and gave me silent treatment every time i rejected his romantic gestures. At one point, i then told him that i felt a bit awkward every time he held my hand. Fortunately, he understood. So he never initiated it again. <br /><br />I loved him very much at the moment but i never knew how to express it. And i was afraid that he might never feel it. So one night, on our way back home from local theater, while we were seating on the back seat of the cab, i held his hand and put it in my heart. I kissed it. And then i hugged him and whispered my feeling toward him to his left ear. He was shocked but happy.<br /><br />After i arrived on my home, he texted me that he felt so happy because of it. And i told him i was the happiest man in the earth because i got an amazing bf like him.<br /><br />From that night, i never felt awkward anymore with showing my affections in the public. In the end i learned a lot of things from him. And i sometimes still miss him.Aries_Boynoreply@blogger.com