So here's a conversation I had with myself yesterday as I got ready to go out to Save-On Foods with Chris.
"It's cold out there. Maybe I should wear the scarf I bought when we were in Paris. I haven't worn it much."
"You mean the one that makes you look gay?"
"It does not make me look gay. Yeah, you're right. It makes me look gay. Maybe I shouldn't wear it. Wait a minute. I am gay."
"True. But do you want to go out of your way to make sure everyone knows it?"
"If they don't already know by looking at me, what harm will a scarf do?"
"This is __________, not Paris. Everyone gets away with wearing scarves in Paris, including men, but are you sure you want to attract that kind of attention to yourself?"
"Maybe you're right. What am I talking about? I'm 51. I'm gay. So what? When will I take responsibility for who I am and stop holding myself back because I'm scared someone might find out I'm gay? Whatever."
(Me wearing the same scarf in Paris, with Notre Dame de Paris behind me, September 2008.)