(* 1. The state or quality of being proper, correct, and socially acceptable. 2. The state or quality of being accepted as valid or important.... (from Google dictionary)).
I believe many gay men have a respectability problem: that is, they don't respect themselves, and, as a result, our society doesn't respect them either. How else to explain some of the things many gay men do?
Unfortunately, the ones who don't respect themselves--who comprise the more visible part of our community--make us all look bad, because that's what our society sees. And that's what it erroneously assumes we're all like.
Here's the bottom line: If we don't respect ourselves, who will?