Over the past several months, I've received emails from a number of young gay men wanting to know how to meet someone, fall in love, and begin a relationship. I've given them the best advice I know, based on my experience being in a relationship with my partner, Chris, over the past twenty-plus years.
But, in my recent reading, I found several quotes from Cheryl Strayed in Tiny Beautiful Things, which constitute about the best advice anyone could ever offer on the subject, whether you're gay or straight. I share these with you below:
...Your best course is to do what everyone who is looking for love does: put your best self out there with as much transparency and sincerity and humor as possible. [p. 199, ebook edition]
We have to be whole people to find whole love, even if we have to make it up for a while. [p. 275, ebook edition]
Honesty is a core value in any healthy and successful relationship. [p. 340, ebook edition]
And, finally, the best advice of all, the piece that tells us meeting someone, falling in love, and sharing a life together is nothing less than magic:
The question about who you will love and when you will love him is out of your hands. It's a mystery that you can't solve. [p. 153, ebook edition]
I cannot recommend Strayed's Tiny Beautiful Things more highly. She is not your "Dear Abby" or your "Ann Landers" (for those of you who remember them as well-known advice columnists). The readers's letters in Strayed's book, and her advice that can only be described as extraordinary, are as profound and as gritty as you'll ever read.
I believe this book will change you in ways you can't imagine. Please read it. I urge you.