Letter to the Editor of "Xtra!" (Updated)

Referring to Mr. McCann’s editorial (“Flying the Freak Flag,” Xtra!, #467), beyond what a straight person might think of me by looking at your newspaper, I’m tired of seeing drag queens, and hyper-sexualized leather men and go-go boys in your pages.  They, and what they represent, are as far away from my life as a fifty-something gay man, partnered for nineteen years, and living in the suburbs, as you can get.  Most times, I wonder why I even bother picking up Xtra!.  

Still, keep the freak show going, because, yes, there are plenty of freaks among us, and they should be seen and heard for amusement purposes.  But I, and apparently a number of your other readers, would appreciate seeing more images of non-freaks, too--those who don’t have a feather boa, a leather harness, or a G-string to their name.  In other words, people over thirty-five with lives, assuming, at our advanced age, we’re still considered part of the community.              

Open your mind, Mr. McCann.  As an editor of arguably the most influential gay and lesbian publication in Canada, you have the opportunity to ensure every segment of our diverse community is represented in a positive and uplifting manner.  Your cavalier attitude doesn’t fly with me, and it shouldn’t with most of your readers, either.  Once you figure out who you serve, I’m hopeful you’ll make better editorial decisions for your newspaper. 


(For the editorial by Marcus McCann I was responding to, please click here.)

Note:  My letter was published in issue #468 of Xtra!, dated July 28, 2011.


Update:

At least two of the letters sent to Mr. McCann subsequent to mine agreed with my point of view (you can see those at the link above, too).

Then this letter appeared in issue #469 of Xtra! dated August 11, 2011:

Referring to Mr. Rick Modien's letter [Letters, Xtra! #468, July 28], referring to Marcus McCann's editorial, all I can muster is "Huh?"

Mr. Modien quotes his age as if to indicate that most gay people of that age feel as he does.  That somehow his view is an entitled one.  To insult drag queens, leather men and anyone else that he sees as freaks is amazing.  Isn't this the backward, prudish and very suburban mindset that we as gay people have been fighting?

Well, Mr. Modien, I too am a gay man over 50, and I understand that it was and is people that follow their true spirit that started the whole gay movement.  It was drag queens that first said "No!" to being arrested for just being.

If it was left up to people like you, we wouldn't be where we are today.

Xtra has had many, many articles of absolute relevance to all the gay community--or do you just look at the pictures?

I'm at the point where I really am at a loss as to what to say to your letter.  I find it hard to believe that someone as old as you doesn't get it.  Gay rights is about sexuality.  It's always been about sexuality.  We are supposed to be free from the restraints of oppressive religion, thought and people like you--the "don't flaunt it because I'm uncomfortable" crowd.

I guess you didn't attend Pride or any events that had "freaks."  Too bad: they are the people you should be thanking.

                                                                                 --Nat Nasci, Vancouver, BC

Rebuttal:

If I have any regrets about my letter to Xtra!, it's that sentence one of paragraph two was snarky, and I apologize to anyone who I offended.  Everything else stands as is.

I do not believe I'm entitled to anything because of my age.  I merely wish to make the point that I know Xtra! will continue to feature freaks (Marcus McCann's word, not mine) in its pages, and I'd like those of us who are not freaks to be featured, too.  Balance is all I ask for.  

Gay rights isn't about sex, at least not to me and not to a lot of other gay and lesbian. It's about love. It's about loving people of the same gender, not having sex with people of the same gender. There is a difference, particularly in how we, as gay people, represent ourselves to the mainstream community in publications like Xtra!, the annual Pride parade, and other LGBT events.

And, finally, for the third year in a row, no, Chris and I did not attend the pride parade (or any of the events for that matter).  We made that choice because, as middle-aged gay men, we feel what the parade has to offer not only doesn't interest us but doesn't represent us and how we feel about ourselves at this point in our lives.

When the Pride Society cleans up its act; implements rules around blatant nudity, sexuality, and obscenity (physical and verbal); enforces the rules; ensures our one big, annual public event is not only positive and uplifting in all respects, but also family-friendly (as many in the mainstream community want), then Chris and I will be happy to take in the parade and show our pride as gay men and a gay couple.

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I'm compelled to draw your attention to this article, which was one of the comments left to my letter on the Xtra! website.  Please click here to check it out.