Thursday, July 7, 2011

A Message for Those Unable to Accept a Gay Relative or Friend

For those of you who don't accept, support, and love a relative or friend who is gay, what do you think you're doing to him?  Do you think you're somehow waking him up?  Making him realize he's straight after all?  Do you think you'll fix him?

Ain't going to happen.  When you're gay, you're gay.  That won't change, no matter how much you want it to, no matter how badly you treat your supposed loved one.  All you succeed in doing is alienating him, making him feel more conflicted than he already does.  Worst of all, you force him to hate himself.  

All of us, gay or straight, should know nothing good comes from hating yourself.  In fact, entire lives are destroyed when people hate themselves.  Some hate themselves so much, they commit suicide.  How can ruining your gay relative or friend's life--maybe even leading to his suicide--be better than accepting, supporting, and loving him?  How?

Stop judging your gay relative or friend.  Stop thinking you know what's best for him.  Stop trying to make him something he isn't, something he will never be.

Start accepting, supporting, and loving him, unconditionally.  You can make all the difference in his world.  You alone.  Don't underestimate how important your acceptance, support, and love will be in his life.                      


  1. Hey, Wendy. Great to hear from you. Thanks for your comment.